We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Randomize
