He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize