Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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