Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
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