I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
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