I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize