Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
