I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
