Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Randomize
