My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
