but the lizard people decide everything anyway
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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