i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
