sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Couch. On fire.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
