He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
