and my herpes radar will keep us safe
It's just like the Real World with babies
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Randomize
