I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize