Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
