The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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