she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
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You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
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