batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
