Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
So apparently I’m into choking now
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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