Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize