Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize