i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
She told me I should be a condom model.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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