She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
