Can i not drive my cunt home
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Randomize
