so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize