There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
