I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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