Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(630): View more from Illinois

I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.

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(940): View more from Texas

there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay

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(250): View more from British Columbia

for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.

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(515): View more from Iowa

This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.

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(347): View more from New York

I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?

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(434): View more from Virginia

The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.

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(701): View more from North Dakota

You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.

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