He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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