just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
