I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
