I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize