Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
