Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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