Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
What kind of friend would I be if I didn't make you hate things you once loved?
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
