Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
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