Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
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we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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