I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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