Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
