ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize