then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
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