I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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