So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Every concussion has its silver lining
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Randomize
