I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize