Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
