You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
id be glad to
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
