at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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