what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
