Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
